| freedom is just another word for nothin left to lose.... |
[entries|friends|calendar] |
|
|
The greatest fan of your life.
|
|
|
|
[27 Nov 2005|05:42pm] |
|
I'm too busy to keep up with this and My Space. Does anyone do the LJ thing anymore? Comment if you still read this...
|
|
|
[18 Sep 2005|12:42pm] |
|
"Anyone can give up. It's the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that's true strength."
|
|
|
[23 Jan 2005|08:37pm] |
How can someone blatantly diss you
And then ignore you like you did something wrong?
It's the most ridiculous thing I've ever seen
I don't even know what to say
It's so stupid it's almost funny
|
|
|
[20 Jan 2005|10:13pm] |
I finally feel like I have a talent.
It's guitar.
And I LOVE it.
Making music is so rewarding.
Perhaps I will pursue a musical career
Maybe a rock star.. Haha
Maybe I should stick to something safe
Like a doctor
I've always wanted to be a doctor.
Why am I thinking about this now?
|
|
|
[13 Jan 2005|05:08pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 sad |
] |
Today was horrible. My turtle Squirtle has passed away, and I am devastated. I loved that turtle, and I only had him one month. I don't know how he died, and I'm afraid Stomp might die too now. We are going to get some more turtles Saturday so he will have friends. My grandma is really sick. She's had colon cancer for years now, but they don't think she will make it this time. It's hard to take in because she's been sick so long and she's always pulled through, but I just have this feeling like this is really it this time. To think that last month was possibly the last Christmas we will have together makes me want to cry. I don't know what to do - I feel like there is so much death around me.
* (my turtle dying was extra sad because it was one of the presents Jack got me for Christmas)
|
|
|
[10 Jan 2005|05:05pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 excited |
] |
Next month is special, and I am excited.
|
|
|
[21 Nov 2004|01:04am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 tired |
] |
Made school history
Jack's coming home in 3 DAYS...
Life is excellent.
ALTHOUGH... I am disappointed in my SAT scores. Everyone says I am being hard of myself. I have to take the new ones anyway. I should write in here more because it's fun to go back and read. We won our semi-final regional finals last night 16-13.. It was amazing. For being so far away we had a good sized crowd and they really got into it. This week we play Mainland and they expect a few thousand people to attend. I AM REALLY EXCITED. This week is going to be amazing between Jack, the game, and NO SCHOOL. Basketball season starts Monday. YAAAAY. I washed dishes for 2 hours straight tonight.. With a burnt hand. Burn your hand, stick it in hot water, and tell me how it feels. NOT GOOD AT ALL. But Alexa and Brooke came and visited so it wasn't all terrible. Oh and my stalker called the restaurant. I told him I was 16 and he said he thought I was older and apologized. Come to find out he is only 27 (or so he says), but hopefully that's the end of it. I went Christmas shopping with my mom today, witnessed a robbery, got my hair done.. a productive day I would say. Everyone should deck their cars, bodies, etc out for the game this week and of course COME!! I am tired and rambling so I'm gonna wrap this up.
|
|
|
[10 Oct 2004|09:12pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
tired |
] |
If you weren't at the New Smyrna Stadium Friday night, you missed a hell of a game.. Made a field goal in the last 16 seconds for a 9-7 victory.. Lots of crowd interaction.. I love games like that. Yesterday was stressful because my gay work made me come in despite having to do a project (apparently my part-time fast food job has taken priority over my education). Well that messed up everything, because Sarah was supposed to spend the night. She ended up still sleeping over, but I didn't get home until like 11:45 and we got nothing done. Today I was supposed to work from 12-8, but I got someone to cover for me until 4. Trying to figure out this acting project was not easy - I hate computers. We are finally done though. I'm exhausted. I don't like my job. I'm looking for a new one.
|
|
|
[07 Oct 2004|09:59pm] |
|
Apparently, night goggles are cooler than me.
|
|
|
[07 Oct 2004|08:43pm] |
Here we lie again, on two serarate beds, riding phone lines..
Tell me what you thought about when you were gone and
So alone...
The worst is over
You can have the best of me.
We got older,
But we're still young,
We never grew out of this feeling that we won't give up
Jumping to conclusions
Made me fall away from you
I'm so glad that the truth
Brought back together me and you
We're not ready to give up.
|
|
| Living in your letters- Dashboard |
[06 Oct 2004|11:20pm] |
Always assuming the worst
But you're going on none the less
And there's nothing to cushion your heart led fall
Letters from further away
Keep pulling me close to home
And there's something to cushion my callous sighs
And I know that you hope for
Longer good-byes
Embracing for forever
And falling in your eyes
In your eyes
In my eyes
Pouring over photographs
I'm living in your letters
Breathe
Deeply from this envelope
It smells like you
And I can't be
Without that scent
It's filling me
With all you mean to me
To me
Continually failing these trials
But you stand by me nonetheless
And you won't let me sink
Though I'm begging you
I'm begging you
Phone calls from further away
And messages on my machine
But I don't ever tell you this distance
Seems terrible
And there's no need to test my heart,
With useless space
These roads go on forever
There'll always be a place
For you
In my heart
So I'll hit the pavement
It's gotta be better than waiting
And pushing you far away
Cause I'm scared.
So I'll take my chances
And head on my way up there
Cause turning to you is like falling in love when you're ten..
|
|
| perfect. |
[02 Oct 2004|12:08pm] |
I Will Never Be The Same
by Melissa Etheridge
So you walked with me for a while
Bared your naked soul
And you told me of your plan
How you would never let them know
In the morning of the night
You cried a long lost child
And I tried on I tried to hold you
But you were young
And you were wild
[CHORUS]
But I, I will never be the same
Oh I, I will never be the same
Caught in your eyes
Lost in your name
I will never be the same
Secrets of your life
I never wanted for myself
But you guarded them like a lie
Placed up on the highest shelf
In the morning of the night
When I woke to find you gone
I knew your distant devil
Must be draggin' you along
[CHORUS]
And you swore that you were bound for glory
And for wanting you had no shame
But I loved you
And then I lost you
And I will never be the same
[CHORUS]
|
|
|
[02 Oct 2004|11:49am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 nostalgic |
] |
I am doing my science homework right now, for the third time. You would think after doing the wrong assignment once, I would make sure I was doing the right one the second time. Nope. Looking in my planner would be way too easy. I've realized that being lazy results in having to do more work later on. I was too lazy to get my planner, so it ended up taking me 2 hours to do a 20 minute assignment.
Anyway. Work was insane last night. Almost as bad as Youth group night. There were so many people. Then one of my co-workers slipped and hurt her hip, so we were short one person. I only talked to Jack for like 30 minutes yesterday.. I get the feeling he doesn't want to talk to me as much when he's with the water polo team.
It's weird how people grow, change and drift apart, and although it will never be the same, a glimmer of that bond they once shared still lingers..
|
|
|
[30 Sep 2004|11:14pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
exhausted |
] |
Ahh. What a crazy day. School, 2 pep rallies, SAT prep, 3 1/2 hour football game.. And all on 4 1/2 hours of sleep!!! I haven't been this tired in quite a while. I would make a great doctor being able to function of such limited sleep. The game was ok.. except for losing of course.. I was really hyper due to an Iced Caramel Macchiato from Starbucks. Man, I love those things like nothing else in the world (except canoles). The ideal meal would be canoles and a grande Iced Caramel Macchiato. I always make such an idiot out of myself at games but I have fun and that's all that matters. It feels like Friday. I don't want to go to school tomorrow...
|
|
|
[24 Sep 2004|09:48pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
lonely |
] |
I feel really left out and second best right now. I'm so sick of doing so much for people only to be put on the back burner. It's always the same crap.. Maybe I need to change. Maybe I need to stop giving so much and caring. This cheers me up.. Haha
F150HottBoy [9:50 PM]: i might stay in tonight..i feel like reading
F150HottBoy [9:51 PM]: remember you used to read..until you got that eye infection
|
|
|
[18 Sep 2004|10:23pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
tired |
] |
It's finally Saturday, I'm so happy to see this crazy week end. Last night we had our second football game again Flager Palm Coast. We won 7-6. It wasn't a big win, but a win nonetheless. And we were robbed of a touchdown we made. But it was a good game, very exciting. I love those kind of games, the kind that get intense and suspenseful at the end.. It reminds me why I love cheerleading so much. After the game, I was more tired than I have been in a long time. Last night I got a good 10 or so hours of sleep and then worked from 12-8, which is the longest shift I've ever had. I was pretty tired after about 3 hours.. I think I'm anemic because I am always tired.
|
|
| If I could change the world, you would think my love is really somethin good.... |
[15 Sep 2004|10:42pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 productive |
] |
Craziness and chaos these past couple of days. Yesterday was our first day back since our little break. Of course I have a ton of homework, which is actually my fault because I am a procrasinator. Needless to say I had no time to do it. I worked from 5-9. And didn't get my homework done. Baah I disappoint myself sometimes, but it ended up not being a problem. Anyway today was totally out of control. First of all, they took away our early release Wednesdays until Christmas break. I don't know about the rest of you, but I NEED that extra hour. Time is a precious commodity that I have come to lack, appreciate and desire greatly. So we stayed until 2:45 today, then I went straight to cheerleading, which lasted until 5. Then I rushed home, took a shower, ate my dinner in about 50 seconds and worked from 6-9:40 (I was supposed to work until 10 but I got off early). But work was fun. I really do enjoy going to work for the most part.. I mean not to the point of working for free, but it's quite tolerable. Kife has been really hectic, but that's the way I like it. And I have to say staying busy and doing things is much better then sitting at home all day. I feel really productive, I just wish there were like 5 more hours in each day. Life would be so much easier but time would be even less appreciated than it is now.
|
|
|
[13 Sep 2004|12:12pm] |
|
So much homework, so little time... I could use another hurricane. Kiddingggg!
|
|
|
[09 Sep 2004|01:41am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 touched |
] |
Life is so precious.
R.I.P. Mrs. Krons and Tails
|
|
|
[07 Sep 2004|11:19am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 hot |
] |
Seems like I can finally rest my head on something real
I like the way that feels...
Yet another crazy weekend adventure with the Mularkeys!
Wednesday, at our first official football game, Mrs. Mularkey calls and tells me we are leaving at 10AM the next day for North Carolina. We had discussed this before, as a backup plan, but I really didn't we would actually do it. So I went home and packed. The next day we drove 14 hours to North Carolina and finally got there at like midnight. We stayed with Jack's grandma and her husband Fred. They are hilarious. The next day, Friday, Mr. Mularkey and I drove to Atlanta, about 3 hours away, to pick up Jack. His flight got in at 8:55. It's always so amazing to see him after being apart for weeks at a time. I can't explain it, but it's the best. Anyway we went to this HUGE burger place called The Varsity for dinner. It was supposedly like the biggest burger place in the world at one time or something. Then we drove back to NC. The next day was the best of the trip. We went white water rafting. Our instructor was so funny, but I don't think he knew it. The water was a freezing 46 degrees! Anyway, that night was our "alone time". HAHA. His family is really funny about that, but they have gotten much better. All of us went to this Mexican restaurant and it was seriously the best Mexican food I've ever had. So around 8:30 Jack and I leave, and we are in the smallest town in the country, and there is nothing to do. They had a movie theatre which was playing 3 movies. We went and got ice cream and just hung out. Sunday was nice too. We rented a pontoon boat for like 5 hours and just relaxed. We rented a jet ski but it broke after about 30 minutes, right when I got on it coincidentally. So after we took it back, we went to this rope swing thing. I climbed up there but got scared, so I was up there like 20 minutes before I finally did it. It was so much fun though. That night we made smores and watched the Sandlot. We are such kids :) Monday morning we woke up at 4:30AM and got everything packed and headed to the airport. Saying goodbye never gets easier, but if it did I would be worried. It only took us 12 hours to get home. So now I'm finally home. I really can't take much more of this hurricane season. There was a lot of damage from this one. I'm so sorry to anyone that lost their homes or posessions. We have no school this week. We are going to go from being Juniors to Seniors in like a week if this keeps up because we are going to have no summer.
|
|
| navigation |
| [ |
viewing |
| |
most recent entries |
] |
| [ |
go |
| |
earlier |
] |
|
|
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif?v=88.8){kind=small}
mellowyellow09's journal